If you have followed or know me in ‘real life’ you know that I adore the Buffalo Bills. From schedule release to Super Bowl …I’m there! After last night’s loss against Cincinnati, I watched the post-game interview with Josh Allen. Honestly, he looked like he was carrying the burden of the whole team and fan base …those shoulder pads looked like they were weighing him down instead of protecting him at that moment.

As Leaders I think that is probably something we’ve all felt. While I may not have had the weight of shoulder pads (well, okay, I did in the ’80’s, but we do not need to talk about that!) I have certainly felt what the heaviness of carrying a team only to be let down by those who are at the top. And, while there are times and decisions that I will take accountability for, those above me should have provided guidance and coaching.

In my last full time position I had eleven managers in seven years. Let’s have that sink in …ELEVEN people who served as my leadership. All of them, ultimately, removed from the organization. How the heck could I thrive if every few months I had to readjust my messaging …my clients had to readjust who they were connecting with. There was no room for growth and potential after the last ‘used car salesman’ of a manager and, I no longer felt the opportunity and, quite frankly, I didn’t care enough anymore to focus on that growth.

I look at my role as a leader to serve and commit to my team every day, so they never have a question of where they stand, growth potential or opportunities they want to take. Why suffocate someone who has the pure desire to do great things. The answer is you shouldn’t…you give them reach opportunity and provide enough care and support that they know you are there if needed. You become the catalyst for success …theirs, yours and the organization we serve.

Today I spoke with an upcoming guest on my podcast, Powered by Authenticity. We shared our war stories of being female leaders in technology and as I was reminiscing about those eleven managers all of the painful, hopeless memories came flooding back in. The many hours of unclear and sub-par direction, having to recredential myself, explain what it was that I did for the organization and how my team of so many talented technologists should be treated like the champions they were.

Now that I am on the outside of that situation, I am trying to remind myself of how much growth I did experience during those difficult days. Most importantly, I understand the person I will never become just to obtain a certain level…those eleven people all had one thing in common, they cared more about the salary than the people. And, honestly, during every excruciating conversation I cared about my people …my team was more important to me than the business. A misalignment of values and perspective that would never resolve.

While being independent has its challenges, I can honestly say that I can now direct my attention to making a difference in the lives of those around me. It may not feel like it every day (it is still work), but I can take a step back knowing and believing that people can approach me with no chance of being treated with anything but respect.

So, Josh, know that those of us who really saw the look of the overwhelming heavy quarterback shoulder pads, we appreciate the leadership qualities you must possess to show that much unspoken caring and love. Don’t worry …your city…your fans …your team know it’s not all on you.

I hope each of you know that while the days of being a leader feel heavy at times, they do provide an opportunity to make an impact on the lives of those you serve. Stay strong and keep going!

Go Bills!

P.S. – picture of Ken and I with Josh Allen at the 50-yard finish run…